Fun Things to do in Yosemite



ADDITIONAL POINTS OF NOTE:
Every camp within Yosemite provides "bear boxes" outside your tent/cabin, which is a box where you store all of your food so bears can't get it. The box isn't locked but it has a tricky mechanism so humans can open it but bears can't. It makes you think twice about going to get a snack. "Hey, I think I want some Pringles. Eh, nevermind. Not worth the effort" For that reason, those hoping to lose weight might consider putting a bear box in your home kitchen as a helpful dieting tool.

Half Dome is the big, congratulatory hike to attempt. In August, it is frustrating due to the hordes of people hiking with you. I didn't attempt it, I don't like crowds while I hike.

Yosemite offers night tram tours during full moons. Its beautiful seeing El Capitan, The Cathedral, etc. in the full moonlight.

Solvang, CA: Once Is Enough

Solvang is a perfect storybook town about 2.5 hours north of LA and 25 minutes east of Santa Barbara. Its shops are filled with things your Aunt Carol would adore. Its quaint and cute and wonderful for about three hours while you eat Danish food and sample wine and take quirky pictures for Facebook and Twitpic and then...
so which way back to the 101?

Secret Punk Rock Trailer Park in Joshua Tree

You have to make a reservation on the website in order to be emailed the actual secret directions to the trailer palace in the desert, pretentiously called, for lack of a better tag, an "artists retreat." But that's really the only proper way to describe it since it serves no exact purpose. They have a recording studio, stage, trailers for vacation rental, pool, bar... Its a really cool idea and the themed trailers make you want to stay.

Even if you're not into vintage trailers, country, rockabilly, or punk rock music, the desert, or drinking, I'm sure the mention of top secret directions piques your interest as if I just said, "Hey, thanks for house-sitting for me, by the way, don't look in my closet, I don't like anyone to know what's in there... Okie dokie, here's the keys, you're totally alone and unsupervised, see ya in a week!"

Guitar Ghosts of Bakersfield, CA

If you ask anyone from Bakersfield about things to do in Bakersfield, they'll tell you to take the grapevine somewhere better. Don't. The misplaced Texas town (its in California) has plenty to offer, especially if you like dive bars and diner food and people who wear Ed Hardy-ish clothing with rhinestone embellishments. You know the type. Visit anyway

The Pyranees and Noriega's are two restaurants that offer Basque dining, which is somehow a big deal in Bakersfield. I didn't eat at either establishment because they serve dinner too early but the bar at the Pyranees was dead and delightful. Our drunk and PMSing bartender ducked into the back and told us to "fix your own goddamn drink".
Then came her boss, a put-upon townie named EZ, who rallied and did his best to fashion some city-girl drinks for us out-of-towners. He was fun, sarcastic, charming, told us about the bar's resident ghost, and enjoyed our company (we think).


The famous Crystal Palace is beutiful but disappointing due to all the Brad Paisley-type bands that perform that pop-country crap that's taken over the town's music scene since Buck Owens died. Its a crying shame. The dive bar Trouts isn't any better music-wise but does offer the firey pickin' style of Brian Longbeck who plays with the house band. Longbeck's guitar skills were one of the reasons for our trip to Bakersfield. His band at Trout's mainly plays your run-of-the-mill "Brown Eyed Girl" and other cheesy favorites but if you request it, he'll bust out some amazing Joe Maphis-style picking that will blow you away. He's an artist that only a real Guitar Geek will appreciate


Thanksgiving in mid-century leisure



Palm Springs, CA is a city of gay people and old people and old, gay people and what's one thing they all adore? Mid-century architecture. May sound a little boring for some college kid looking for a good time but what's great about Palm Springs is there's no lack of hot tubs.


Get
some friends and a few cases of Pacifico and google "Palm Springs rentals" and spend the weekend in the hot tub of some cool art deco house with weird art on the walls, it just may be the former home of Kate Smith or a forgotten 1950's B-lister.




The Collins Kids at the Barris car show

The Collins Kids are my favorite icons of rockabilly, somehow overshadowed by everyone on Sun Records. I love watching videos of them as kids on YouTube and today I saw Larry Collins bop and bounce and grin exactly the way he did when he was nine. It was like witnessing a social experiment on how mannerisms remain the same as you age


My sun fried shoulders are well worth the 45 minute set they played at the Cruisin Back to the 50's car show in Culver City. Lorrie is still gorgeous. She's the original Britney Spears. She dated Ricky Nelson, then eloped with Johnny Cash's manager when she was 16. Larry is mesmerizing and looks like he's done some hard living. They played with Deke Dickerson, a regular headliner in the rockabilly scene, and between Deke and Larry, you've never seen such speedy guitar picking since Town Hall Party

The car show was hosted by George Barris, who is responsible for custom building every iconic vehicle of American television like the Munster's Koach, the Batmobile, the General Lee, the Clampett's Jilopy, and every other car that was on the TV shows that raised you

Cruisin Back to the 50's is a fun event for those getting their first taste of classic car culture but not yet ready to devote their lives to cuffed jeans and cake makeup

Hike & Lunch at Solar de Cahuenga

The Hollywood sign hike is a long one but not too difficult. The big problem is that its easy to take a wrong path and get lost, which is ridiculous and embarrassing. To get lost in Griffith Park (where the sign is located) is as pathetic as getting lost in Sears. Griffith Park isn't terribly rugged, its in the middle of Hollywood, and its full of tourists and joggers so getting lost is kind of a slap in the face to an avid outdoorsman

After the hike, we had lunch at Solar de Cahuenga, which is one of those places where everyone’s on their laptop writing a screenplay. Like the Hollywood sign hike, the cafe is a gem nestled in a dirty, busy metropolis. But its adorable! They have a wide selection of crepes and panini and most days, they offer a pitcher of water with cucumbers and lemons in it. That's right, lemons AND cucumbers. You're welcome.

My friend and I sat next to an obnoxious and odd duo that I can only assume was a man who was teaching a class on how to be a screenwriter and a young woman student of his who wanted to bend his ear over coffee. Here are my favorites of the ridiculously pretentious things they said:

Talking about his writing style:
MAN: My problem is, I can’t get away from the Holocaust thing. It just heavily influences my writing. You know, I didn’t know anyone who was in the Holocaust, no family or friends but I do have an acquaintance whose uncle was in a camp so its things like that that really creep up in my writing.

GIRL: I had this incredible dream the other night. It took place in a harbor or something and involved a shark and a really strong black woman, you know one of those characters the audience really grabs onto. I woke up and thought, well there’s my premise

GIRL: I used to be an actress, with the headshots and the whole deal, and I did a few commercials or whatever but that’s just not where my heart is, I’m a storyteller

MAN: Writers have to be dark and troubled, that’s what sells. Even in my Sabrina days [I believe this man used to work for Sabrina the Teenage Witch] it was still important to go to some really dark places with my writing. I could see you doing that, you seem like you’ve had a torrid past.

GIRL: I can write really dark. Sometimes I just have to put myself in a bad mood and say, hey, today I’m going to think about bad stuff.


Is this where you see the two of them getting all breathy and sweaty? That’s what I thought was going to happen too, but no. They just went back to talking about strong black women characters.

Despite such eavsdroppings, the Solar de Cahuenga is one of my favorite places in Hollywood to go for a relaxing brunch or lunch. You order at the counter and they give you a number, its very bright and sunny, the food is good, and the laptoppers keep to themselves so the atmosphere is quiet and quaint